Dealing With My Intense Emotions
BRD REFLECTIONS:
2 Samuel 13:1-39, 14:1-33 and Psalm 71:1-13 (NIV)
(David Blakely, Counsellor)
READ:
2 Samuel 13:2-3, 15 (NIV)
2Amnon became so obsessed with his sister Tamar that he made himself ill. She was a virgin, and it seemed impossible for him to do anything to her. 3Now Amnon had an adviser named Jonadab son of Shimeah, David’s brother. Jonadab was a very shrewd man.
15Then Amnon hated her with intense hatred. In fact, he hated her more than he had loved her. Amnon said to her, “Get up and get out!”
2 Samuel 14:29-30 (NIV)
29Then Absalom sent for Joab in order to send him to the king, but Joab refused to come to him. So he sent a second time, but he refused to come. 30Then he said to his servants, “Look, Joab’s field is next to mine, and he has barley there. Go and set it on fire.” So Absalom’s servants set the field on fire.
Psalm 71:5-6 (NIV)
5For you have been my hope, Sovereign Lord,
my confidence since my youth.
6From birth I have relied on you;
you brought me forth from my mother’s womb.
I will ever praise you.
OBSERVE:
In 2 Samuel 13 you read about Amnon’s impulsive and destructive response to his half-sister Tamar. He allowed lust and desire to consume his mind, leading to a depressed state of mind. In that depressed state of mind Jonadab gave advice that though shrewd, gave permission for Amnon to surrender to his desires and sacrifice righteousness.
Absalom, Tamar’s full brother, and the half-brother of Amnon then set a plot that ended with Absalom killing Amnon. Once Amnon was killed Absalom fled the country until King David gave Absalom permission to return home without threat of loss of life. However, Absalom was not happy with this result. He wanted more. Absalom desired to be fully greeted by his father, David. In that longing to have his father acknowledge him, Absalom set Joab’s field on fire to instigate a response from Joab. In a moment of longing to be reunited, Absalom surrendered to impatience and frustration and sacrificed righteousness.
APPLY:
Though my life is very different from Amnon’s and Absalom’s lives, there is a real parallel that is true for me. At moments of impatience, frustration, longing or desire I find myself at times willing to take any advice that sounds good to my ears. I find myself sacrificing righteousness, that only comes through faith and obedience in Jesus, and accepting advice that gets me what I want. The issue is not my intense emotions, but rather, who I bring my intense emotions to.
DO:
I shall cling to the message of Psalms 71:5-6. I will commit to rely on God alone when I make decisions in the midst of my more intense emotions.
On a practical level I do this by taking a few important steps. First, I acknowledge to God and trusted friends the intense emotions I am experiencing and what is coming to my mind as I handle these emotions. Second, I commit to pause for a period of time to hear and reflect on the advice that God and my trusted friends are giving me. This is important, as it delays my impulsiveness and increases the chance I will remain in submission to God. Third, once I act on those intense emotions, I again share with God and my trusted friends. This creates accountability for me, keeping the door open for continued loving guidance.
PRAY:
Lord, today I acknowledge each feeling I am experiencing and my often-corrupted ideas for how to respond. I ask today for Your guidance, correction, love and reassurance to guide me. Give me courage through Your Spirit to remain in accountability with my godly friends and family. Thank You for Your continued grace and mercy each time I stumble. I pray in Your son Jesus’ name. Amen.
